Truths in Disruption

I recently read another blog that really hit home.  Here is the link, along with a passage from the post:

A wise counselor cut through the emotional red tape and pointed out some simple truths. He needed time and undivided attention. I was stretched to the limit. He needed to be babied. I already had babies. I was unable to prioritize his needs over the needs of our younger children. She reiterated and cemented some facts in our minds. There is a reason that most adoption specialists recommend against adopting out of birth order. Children with attachment-related negative behaviors often thrive as the youngest or only child. Second placements succeed at a very high percentage rate because the second family is prepared for the behavioral challenges and the situation is tailored to the child’s needs. She provided a little balsam for our raw emotions. Some children, she told us, just need a transitional family. Some families and kids are a poor fit. They usually succeed in their second home, sometimes without ever demonstrating the same negative behaviors. As much as I hated being a ‘poor fit’ for my child, I knew that it was true.
Dreams end. Hearts break.